The Kids Have Left, Now What?
Walking in the hot, blazing sun, I wiped my brow, water in my other hand, ready to go inside another apartment, looking for the one that would be a dwelling for her, thinking, “Is this too soon?” My throat constricted as I thought of my baby leaving the nest. I wanted to push off father time and hold her just a little longer, repeating the words, “Not yet, not yet.” But no, time was marching on, too quickly, and I knew this time was coming, but how was my momma heart going to react? Was I ready? Was she ready?
I knew that someday I would have to release my kids into the world, let them fly and be free, to enjoy the benefits of grown-up hood, its pleasures and sorrows, ebbs and flows - am I being dramatic here? But I did not know it would come so quickly. It is like one day they are babies (at the time it seemed like a REAL long time), and the next, they are adults. Since I was a stay-at-home mom, I was so used to them and their activities, and I think that is what kept me going, living their activities through myself and enjoying each moment.
So, now what?
Well, it was time for this momma to redefine herself and it is a life-long process! Have you went through empty nest lately? It is a big deal and do not let anyone say it is not! It is so hard to let go of your precious babies, but we have to someday, just like you left the nest long ago.
Here are some tips to help prepare you for that day, or if you are in the throes of it right now, these tips may come in handy:
It is okay to cry. I cried rivers when my baby left. Just remember, you once left when you were young too, so now it is your kids turn.
Find something to keep you busy. Maybe start a new hobby or return to a hobby you once did. I started writing again, plus I took art classes, to bring out those juicy creative skills that I long had buried.
Take a fun class. Or a class that makes you think. Something to remind yourself that you have value and wisdom.
Start an exercise program, if you have not already. There is nothing like exercising to release those happy hormones!
Start a new job! If you were a stay-at-home mom, like me, find a job that is of interest of you. Brush up on your job skills by taking a class if needed.
I have heard that the second half of your life can be better, with all the knowledge you have acquired, a better sense of confidence and a different way of looking at life. I know how hard it is to let go and move forward in your life, especially when the last child leaves the comfort of the nest, but it is a part of life. Life can move fast, even with kids, but now is the time for YOU.
YOU matter. YOU have value. YOU can do this. Think of it as an opportunity for growth for you, an opportunity to learn and appreciate things in life that you did not have time for when you were younger. This can be an exciting time for you! What are you waiting for?
Share with us something you are doing without the kids today!